My husband said Linda, our daycare provider/aunt, found Meyer not breathing. I immediately started screaming  and knew in my heart my worse fear had come true. It was the longest drive from Norfolk to Columbus in my life, begging God that everything would be ok. I walked into the hospital and I saw my husband look at me and just shake his head while bursting into tears. I dropped to the floor in pain, I didn’t know my heart could physically hurt from the emotional pain one could feel. I remember holding my sweet boy and thinking, just wake up, you look so perfect, how could you be gone? Once a silly chunky and energetic little boy and now silent in my arms. So many questions race to your mind, why us? Why him? He’s so little, its just not fair!

 

We were in complete shock on the way home from the hospital. Then, I received a Facebook message from the Briggs and Barrett Project, letting us know how sorry they were to hear about our loss, but we aren’t alone in this journey. They helped us so much, from not only the  support side of it, but also in preparation on what the week could bring. To this day I thank God for having the project reach out right away. It not only helped  prepare us, but also guide us along this unimaginable journey. Knowing how much their support helped me, made me realize how important it was to have a community of people around you that can be there for you and know exactly how you feel. I knew I wanted to get involved, and that is why I helped create Meyer’s SIDS Retreat- To help form a community of women to support each other on this grief journey that no one wants to be on.

 

I see Meyer everyday through my two little angels here on earth that he sent us from heaven. I feel blessed to be his mommy and the retreat is a way to honor him and bring all of our sweet angels in heaven together to celebrate their short but so very sweet little lives.